Motivation and change

/Motivation and change

Wow, I Have Really Been Off my Game!

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I really owe you my dear reader, an apology. I haven’t posted since April 2018. What have I been doing? You know life isn’t supposed to get in the way of your business, but mine sure has. Like many of you, every so often we reach a crossroads in our life. Where am I and what should I do next? I know I love all of you, your notes and your phone calls so I don’t want to leave you. I want to make it more interesting. I’ve put together a bunch more for you! By the way, I’ve started sending new weekly emails through Followyourcustomer–I am adding you to the list. You can opt out if you don’t like them.

I’M NOT GOING ANYWHERE!

Many of you know I spend a lot of time at the gym—Yoga, Pilates and lifting weights. I also meditate. This helps me stay centered and clear out my thought process. I also attend lots of movies; they give me different ideas.

I am working on a series of online video training programs; when they are ready for release,  you will be the first to know. I am also intending to do a weekly show, WHITEBOARD WEDNESDAY, A FIVE MINUTE TIP AND TRICKS SERIES. I’m intending to make everything fun and would love your thoughts and ideas on what you would like.

Thank you so much for sticking with me; for some of you it has been almost 10 years! I started blogging on July 25, 2008! Maybe I should recycle some of them? Actually I like one called “Overcoming Objections: What about the Ones you Can’t Overcome?” I will find it for you.

Here are some photos of the garden, it’s been a rough year for one of my kitties, Rainyday. He has a terminal disease but he is still making the most of life.

Again I thank  you for bringing me into your life.

Hugs, Lisbeth

Lisbeth has been a motivational speaker and trainer for over 20 years. Her book “Red Hot Customer Service” was voted one of the top customer service books. Look for her on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. To book a consultation, call her at 518.495-5380, EST, or email her at Lcalandrino@nycap.rr.com.

 

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By | 2018-06-20T10:05:00+00:00 June 20th, 2018|Blog, Building a Brand, Building relationships, Motivation and change|Comments Off on Wow, I Have Really Been Off my Game!

Why Captain Jerry Yellin’s Story Matters to all of us

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One year ago, I met Jerry Yellin In Fairfield, Iowa at the home of Ginger and Jim Belilove. Jim is an associate of mine from the floorcovering industry; he is also a very dear friend of Capt. Yellin. Six months before my meeting, Jim asked if I might help raise money for a film he was producing, “Last Man Standing,” a documentary about Captain Yellin.
 
“It would be great if you spent time with Jerry and got to know him, said Jim, you will understand how important the story is to Jerry and its impact on the world.”
 
I didn’t realize this would include a trip to the 45th National Stearman Fly-In, at Galesburg, IL where I would watch Captain Yellin as he flew a Stearman, and I would experience a ride in one of the open-cockpit biplanes. The culmination of the day would be Captain Yellin speaking about how he learned to fly. This is something I will never forget.
 
Prior to meeting Captain Yellin, I had no real experience with war.
 
With television just coming of age in the late 40’s, there were no cameras on the battle field, literally there was nothing to know. Contrast that with today when we are actually on the battlefield.
 
None of my relatives had served so war was nothing we discussed. It wasn’t until I was 9 years old; I had my first awakening of war horrors. I lived in a small town where all the mail was brought to the same mailbox. I used to deliver the mail to the neighbors, and one day a very official letter came from the Department of Defense. I ran to deliver this important-looking letter and stood there while Cissy Sharp started screaming and crying. The letter informed her that her brother had been killed in the Korean War. This is when I began to understand the pain of war. When my friends started returning from Viet Nam, I learned about Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder or PTSD, another side effect of war.
 
I didn’t know what meeting Jerry would mean. Jerry would be a real ‘in person’ awakening for me. This would be when I would understand that war produces living casualties; those returning soldiers with PTSD. I spent a week walking and talking with Jerry. That meant trips to the gym, the golf course and watching Jerry engage with many of his friends. Jerry also talk me about the David Lynch Foundation and the Operation Worrier Wellness.
 
Saying that Jerry is charismatic is an understatement. Jerry is also very humble; he understands people, and time spent with him is transforming. It made me question my thoughts about war and those heroes that are fighting for my liberty. Never again will a pass a veteran without thanking the soldier for fighting for my freedom.
 
As you could tell from the May 28, New York Post article, “WWII’s ‘last fighter pilot’ relives the fateful flight—and the PTSD that followed.” Capt. Yellin is a dynamic man, with a very sharp memory and definite opinions about war.
 
I remember Captain Yellin telling me if you thought you were shooting at real people; you would never have been able to do it. You were fighting so we would all be free. Until 9/11, I never thought about my freedom, did you?
 
As Captain Yellin stated in this interview with The NY Post, “If you want wanna stop war, everybody would go to war naked. Then nobody would know who to shoot.” Television has shown us that war is very real and we are fighting with real people; who are very much like us.
 
If you are interested in helping Captain Yellin complete his documentary, please go to Fundabilities.com, “Last Man Standing.” All donations are tax deductible.
 
Lisbeth Calandrino is a speaker and trainer. To have her speak at your event, contact her at Lcalandrino@nycap.rr.com.
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By | 2017-09-27T18:48:48+00:00 May 29th, 2017|Motivation and change|0 Comments

Are you Still Worrying About the Past?

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What should you worry about?

What should you worry about?

If so you’re not alone. Why do people bring up the past as if it belonged in the present?

If so you’re not alone. Why do people bring up the past as if it belonged in the present?

I love this quote from Art Markman, Ph.D., “When we look back on events from our youth, we are likely to remember many things as being excellent, or awesome, or brilliant. We just forget how we decided on their excellence or brilliance. With a broader base of experience as an adult, it takes a lot for us to be truly awed. So we decide that things must have been better when we were younger.”

It’s not that things were better in the past, it just seems that way! Think about your first kiss, your favorite song was playing, it was a warm summer night, you just saw a great movie and then you kissed. You can never replay this feeling.

The key is to stop comparing everything in the past to the present. I have a friend who always says, “When I was in California, I did this, that and the other thing. (That’s how my mom would put it.) Now my friend does relatively nothing buy go to work!

Five things you can do to make the present awesome:

Stop comparing yourself to others. When you start comparing it means ‘you are less than.’  I remember my first prom and the dress I wanted. It was lovely—long and poufy with 3 roses on the waist. Mom said we couldn’t afford it so I wore a pink, frilly one that I hated.  I was sure people would laugh at me in the pink dress. No one really cared; they were too busy worrying about their own dresses.

Decide to make every day awesome.  Why not love everything about today and find ways to make it special. Today I looked out the window and the sun was reflecting off the snow. It really was lovely; lots of twinkling. I am focusing the beauty rather than the temperature.

Surprise yourself! What can you do that’s out of the ordinary? Put a purple streak in your hair. That would be cool. Make yourself your favorite dessert. Take a different class in the gym; something you’ve thought about but just haven’t done.

Go to the movies and get out of the house! This is my favorite. Many of you stay home and watch Movies at home. Not me, I like laughing with people I don’t know and to treat myself to my favorite tea.

Think about what you can do to influence tomorrow? What would you like to be different next year? Is there somewhere you would like to go? Is there a new skill you want to learn? Do you need some new skills or a new hair style?

Tomorrow today will become your past; make it a good one.

., “When we look back on events from our youth, we are likely to remember many things as being excellent, or awesome, or brilliant. We just forget how we decided on their excellence or brilliance. With a broader base of experience as an adult, it takes a lot for us to be truly awed. So we decide that things must have been better when we were younger.”

It’s not that things were better in the past, it just seems that way! Think about your first kiss, your favorite song was playing, it was a warm summer night, you just saw a great movie and then you kissed. You can never replay this feeling.

The key is to stop comparing everything in the past to the present. I have a friend who always says, “When I was in California, I did this, that and the other thing. (That’s how my mom would put it.) Now my friend does relatively nothing buy go to work!

Five things you can do to make the present awesome:

Stop comparing yourself to others. When you start comparing it means ‘you are less than.’  I remember my first prom and the dress I wanted. It was lovely—long and’ poufy’  with 3 roses on the waist. Mom said we couldn’t afford it so I wore a pink, frilly one that I hated.  I was sure people would laugh at me in the pink dress. No one really cared; they were too busy worrying about their own dresses.

Decide to make every day awesome.  Why not love everything about today and find ways to make it special. Today I looked out the window and the sun was reflecting off the snow. It really was lovely; lots of twinkling. I am focusing the beauty rather than the temperature.

Surprise yourself! What can you do that’s out of the ordinary? Put a purple streak in your hair. That would be cool. Make yourself your favorite dessert. Take a different class in the gym; something you’ve thought about but just haven’t done.

Go to the movies and get out of the house! This is my favorite. Many of you stay home and watch Movies at home. Not me, I like laughing with people I don’t know and to treat myself to my favorite tea.

Think about what you can do to influence tomorrow? What would you like to be different next year? Is there somewhere you would like to go? Is there a new skill you want to learn? Do you need some new skills or a new hair style?

Tomorrow today will become your past; make it a good one.

Today is the only day you can change.

Today is the only day you can change.

Do you need some change in your business? Not sure what it is but you know things have to be different?  Call Lisbeth, 518-495-5380.

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By | 2017-09-27T19:11:36+00:00 January 2nd, 2017|Motivation and change|0 Comments

Don’t let Your Anger get the Best of you

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Thanks to career intelligence.com for the photo.

Thanks to career intelligence.com for the photo.

Today I was in Staples at the checkout counter. (You know, no matter how “enlightened” you are, there are times when someone gets the best of you.)

The salesclerk asked  the customer if he wanted a bag and the customer went off. “Doesn’t every customer get a bag?” he asked. Next he got into it with the debit machine. It was too slow for him. The clerk was cool, but I was beginning to get really annoyed. I would have loved to have told him to shove off. We can’t expect salespeople to know how to handle angry customers but he did a great job.

Have you ever been in a situation like this?

Before you know it, your “button” has been pushed, and suddenly you wish you could eat your words. It’s tempting to want to preserve your good name or make statements to defend yourself. It’s only natural but there are more strategic ways to handle these encounters.

Here are five ways to stay ahead of someone’s anger.

First, take a deep breath and keep your thoughts to yourself. You don’t have to answer immediately. I know it sounds a bit simplistic but why make it complicated? You will thank yourself immediately. I know this doesn’t sound easy, but it really is. Once you take a deep breath it gives you a moment to respond by asking the right questions not responding to the allegations. Sure you have to “think about on your feet” but it’s something we should all learn. Every time you respond to these comments, you have acknowledged that there’s probably some truth to them. Most likely, they’re true for the person slinging the mud, but why must they be to you?

Get one step ahead of the argument. You do this by asking for an example of the behavior they’re accusing you of. This forces them to think and gives you more time to relax and format your response. When this happens you are also in a better position to evaluate the rationality of the accusation.

Why not be receptive to suggestions as to how you can address their concerns. Why not ask, what have I to lose? It shows you’re willing to learn. Just the fact that you are willing to learn will dispel their anger. Don’t be afraid to listen to what is being said, not how it feels. When our feelings get attacked, we go on the defense.

Shove your indignant feelings aside and be inquisitive. Remember, the person that asks questions is in control. The minute you start answering questions, you’re on the wrong side of the argument. Try to understand the allegations on a higher level are if you were defending someone else.

If someone is really angry, take the deep breath and ask if you can start over. This allows the other person to also back in control. Remember they are angry because they are also feeling threatened. Many people aren’t logical and when they’re upset they only know how to express themselves on an emotional level. It’s not personal. #trainingsalespeople #controlling anger

Thanks to Smekens Educational Solutions for photo.

Thanks to
Smekens Educational Solutions for photo.

Watch what you say, you may have to ‘eat those words.’

Sure this takes practice and thoughtfulness on your part. Once you learn how to stay in control of your emotions, life becomes a lot easier. Does your team need training on controlling their anger?

Lisbeth Calandrino has been coaching businesses be more productive and strategic. To learn more about Lisbeth, visit her web site at www.lisbethcalandrino.com, or reach her at Lcalandrino@nycap.rr.com.

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By | 2017-09-27T19:22:45+00:00 December 30th, 2016|Motivation and change|0 Comments
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Does Your Business Keep You up at Night?

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TISE 2017

TISE 2017

Do you wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat? Many say they have their greatest ideas in the middle of the night but most just have anxiety. They are probably dealing with the three P’s: People, Problems and Planning. If you must, write them down in the notebook you keep under your pillow. This is not the time to solve world problems. The mind needs to relax and get refreshed so it can deal with these issues during the day time.

Hey, I’m holding a brainstorming session at TISE. It’s called the Retailer’s Forum and I have 4 retail panelists who have some ideas for the three “P’s.” I have an outline of our topics, bring your ideas and expect to go home with some solutions.

Here’s the link for TISE https://tisewest.com/. Here’s the session information. It’s an hour and a half long so bring that notebook and your ideas so we can talk about employee issues, online marketing, installation concerns and how to get more business. Check this link and you can sign up for the Retailer’s Forum and connect with our retail panel.

Are you wondering how to get the most out of a trade show? If so, watch this video. http://bit.ly/2izWAFN.

CAN’T WAIT TO SEE YOU THERE! CHECK ON THE REST OF MY SEMINARS AT TISE. #TISE

Lisbeth has been helping businesses increase their customer base and develop new business strategies for over 20 years. Reach her at Lcalandrino@nycap.rr.com.

 

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By | 2017-09-27T19:25:29+00:00 December 27th, 2016|Motivation and change|0 Comments

Worrying Will Get You Everywhere

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Thanks to Panama Jackson for image.

Thanks to Panama Jackson for image.

Worrying is like rearranging the chairs on the Titanic deck. Nothing good is going to happen but it keeps you busy. We as a whole stress. The same great apparatuses our cerebrum uses to envision new developments and tackle complex issues, additionally has a propensity for searching for inconvenience – notwithstanding when it may not exist.

 

Mid-terms, spending overwhelms, bug checks, first dates, execution uneasiness – stress likes to stick its nose into each part of our lives. Regardless of how senseless or improbable a situation may appear, it is genuine to you. Numerous have attempted to conquer it totally, and some incredible bosses may have. Yet, for whatever remains of us, having some straightforward procedures to reduce or work with our stresses can positively affect our lives.

 

1 – Schedule time to stress. Regularly if your mind realizes that you would prefer not to stress at this moment, yet you will permit it an opportunity to stress later, the stresses will leave. Plan 10 minutes in the morning, and 10 minutes at night to simply stress. Ordinarily, you won’t discover anything to stress over, yet it’s an approach to get the brain to concentrate on things on your time span.

 

2 – Wipe them away. One trap is to envision a windshield wiper spreading and wiping ceaselessly the stress. At the point when the picture of the stress comes into your head, picture a wiper washing forward and backward, wiping it away. More often than not after two or three times, it will leave, in any event for a brief period.

 

3 – Write out a rundown of stresses. Bunches of self-improvement strategies spin around composing things out. Simply the demonstration of putting things down on paper can reduce tensions.

 

4 – Do something about it. All the more frequently then not, the genuine errand or circumstance that we stress over ends up being a great deal less upsetting than we envisioned. In the event that you bounce in and attempt to make a move, even only a little thing, the force and demonstration of pushing ahead will reduce or mitigate the stress.

 

5 – Don’t lie alert. In the event that you observe that you tend to stress amidst the night, don’t simply remain in quaint little inn the uneasiness defeat you. Get up and make a move. Utilize one of the initial 4 strategies, or your own particular most loved procedure, to get it out of your head. Stresses have a tendency to end up increased when we’re drained – and the dim and stillness of a room around evening time may not help much either. Evil spirits, genuine and envisioned, love that kind of thing.

 

Your stresses are your own, and something you may need to live with, similar to a truly irritating houseguest. Discovering approaches to manage them might be your redeeming quality, since a few houseguests can take a clue, while others simply don’t know when to take off.

 

Lisbeth has been helping businesses worry less for the past twenty years. To help your team get out of the funk, contact her at Lcalandrino@nycap.rr.com.

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By | 2017-09-27T19:27:39+00:00 November 16th, 2016|Motivation and change|0 Comments

Are You Having a Brush With Your Future?

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Thanks to Erin Nelson and "10 Signals,Looking into the Future."

Thanks to Erin Nelson and “10 Signals,Looking into the Future.”

Have you ever gone back into your past and looked into the future; did you say, “How did I get here?”

Try it. It’s a very interesting exercise; it’s taking a good look at who you’ve become. Do you wonder why you chose the path you’ve taken?  Are you wondering where you will be in your next future? Are you where you want to be?  The more you look the more questions you will have.

Many years ago I went to school in Washington, D.C. I used to take the bus to school and talked with this woman who told me she owned a large furniture store. She also said it was very successful but her grown son wasn’t interested in taking it over. Would I come and look at it?

I went to look at it and it was exactly what she said; big and beautiful. I had actually never seen one that nice. I grew up in the country and we never went shopping in NYC for anything. I only went to visit my cousins in the Bronx.

We continued to talk and she invited me to dinner; she was like an aunt—a smart one. Eventually she asked if I would be interested in working with her and learn the business. Eventually she would make me a partner! I was overwhelmed. A graduate student with a part -time job gets an offer like this. She said she knew I was smart and a born salesperson—she was right on that! I remember calling my parents and talking with them. Of course they advised me to talk with a lawyer but I should certainly try it out.

I passed on it. I think I was scared of the responsibility. Of course years later I actually went into the carpet and furniture business with two other partners.

As I look back, I think about the opportunity that I passed on. How different would my life have been? It would have been the road less traveled, but why not? How many other opportunities have you passed on? Do you make the same mistakes?

I’m aware that real opportunities don’t come along that often. I didn’t give this one enough time to ‘settle in.’ I have always been responsible, what was scary about this opportunity?

Looking back doesn’t mean ‘wanting to go back;’ it means evaluating where you’ve been and looking to where you might want to go. It’s a good thing to do. None of us know how much time we really have so why not take advantage of what’s out there?

Remember, your future is before your very eyes.

Lisbeth has been a business and life coach for over 20 years. She has proven that here insights are are very useful to her clients. To book a conversation with her, reach her at Lcalandrino@nycap.rr.com.

 

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By | 2017-09-27T19:28:45+00:00 November 3rd, 2016|Motivation and change|0 Comments

7 Ways to Stop Procrastinating

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running-around-getting-done-poemProcrastinating is something we all do; it’s one of those things you’re not proud of. You look at your long list of important tasks and all of a sudden it’s time to pet the cat or take the dog for a walk. Don’t you wonder where that comes from?

In order to stop procrastinating, you have to rethink what you’re doing. You may have heard these things before but so what.According to Psychology Today, “For some, the very thought of taking a responsible path—where self-care includes “grown up” tasks—threatens to squelch vitality, and foreclose the boundless possibility associated with youth.”

  1. Deadlines are your friend. Instead of a long list of things to do, just note in your reminder the day something has to be done. Now you don’t have a choice or anytime to worry about it.
  2. Do the hard stuff first. It’s not really hard, you’ve just decided it is. Maybe it takes a lot more time to get it done or you just don’t like it. It reminds you of homework.
  3. Stop telling yourself lies. You know the ones that things aren’t really important and what you do doesn’t matter. Whatever you do should always matter to you.
  4. Get off Facebook–you know if you added up the time you spent on there you could probably get way more done. It is a time waster. Lonely? Call a customer.Your imaginary friends with the perfect lives will still be there in a couple of  hours.
  5. Decide what to do with your emails. I read them once, twice and three times for good measure and leave them in my inbox–that’s crazy.
  6. Start anywhere. Sometime starting is half the battle. Just start writing and fix it as you go along.
  7. Okay, so you’re not perfect. Suppose it isn’t perfect so what? And perfect by what standards? I used to get criticized because I didn’t do things perfectly. At one point I realize that getting it done was where I could shine. So if it wasn’t perfect I could fix it. I’ve noticed that many things online aren’t perfect and they’re written by ‘supposedly perfect people.’

Pretend you like getting things done; my mother said it’s good for you!

Lisbeth Calandrino has been an author and speaker for over 20 years. To have her speak at your business, connect with her–Lcalandrino@nycap.rr.com.

Haven’t heard her speak? Check out her web, www.lisbethcalandrino. If you can’t find Lisbeth, she’s probably at the gym or procrastinating.

 

 

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By | 2017-09-27T19:35:17+00:00 October 2nd, 2016|Motivation and change|0 Comments

Communication: It’s Not What You Say, It’s How You Say It

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How much time do you spend preparing? Thursday, October 2, we all watched as Joe Biden and Sarah Palin showed us their communication skills. During the week the news showed clips of Sarah Palin standing behind the podium (on the lawn at John McCain’s house) practicing her talking points. And why shouldn’t she practice? She could wind up with the second highest job in the country or perhaps even that of President.  It just got me thinking, my experience is that most salespeople put lots of time into learning about their products but not as much time into how they present their product and themselves. Maybe they think the outcome of their performance isn’t as big as, say, their preparation for a Vice Presidential debate. But in actuality it is that big. It’s their future.

To be a good salesman you have to know both your product and your audience.

I find that as a speaker and trainer, it’s easier to sell product knowledge classes than it is to sell presentation skills. What salesmen don’t always realize is customers buy “them” before they buy the product knowledge.  It’s a lot easier to listen to the message if you like the presenter. In fact, some studies say that the salesperson is 37% of the sale.

Buying is all about emotion. If I like the salesperson or the presenter, the message sounds better to me. As important is the product is, the presenter is even more important. If we’re not connected to the presenter we tend to discount the message or product. Of course you need to know your “message”; the trick is to know what you’re selling and have the skills to deliver the message.

Too much product makes you boring and too much smiling makes you “fluffy.” The key is to have a good balance.  So how do you put it all together?

  • Do a trial run with your presentation, either in front of peers or a video camera. What do you look like? Are your mannerisms distracting? Are you smiling too much or smiling when you should be serious? Make a list of what’s important to your audience and critique the outcome with a colleague.
  • Know your audience. Be personable and get them to like you. Don’t be sarcastic or project an air of “being above them.”  If they don’t like you, forget your product, it will be hard to get the sale.
  • Project self-confidence. Remember, the audience wants you to do well. If you are uncomfortable and can’t deliver the message, the audience is going to take on your discomfort and pray you’ll get off the stage before it gets any worse.
  • Remember your diction skills. It’s okay to use slang to make a point, not because you don’t know the “right” word.
  • Build passion into your delivery. Speakers who are passionate are remembered. Even if we aren’t sure we agree with them, their emotional delivery will be etched in our memory.
  • Believe in what you’re saying. Believing in what you say and who you are will come across in your delivery. Remember, the key to getting others to buy what you’re selling is to first believe it yourself.
  • Lisbeth has been teaching salespeople for over twenty years. To improve their skills, call Lisbeth at 518-495-5380. EST

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By | 2017-09-27T19:16:54+00:00 October 13th, 2008|Motivation and change|0 Comments