Why do we Care What People Think About us? 4 Ways to get Over it

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Why do we Care What People Think About us? 4 Ways to get Over it

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The sassy soprano with no talent.

The sassy soprano with no talent.

Most of us care what other people think; I would say it’s just human nature. However, some people are actually paralyzed by it. Are there people who really don’t care what people think and follow their dreams despite what anyone says? There seems to be one Florence Foster Jenkins, who fits that description.

Capital Repertory Theater in Albany, New York.

Capital Repertory Theater in Albany, New York.

Last night, we went to see “Souvenir, A Fantasia on the Life of Florence Foster Jenkins.” Florence Foster Jenkins, she always went by the three names, was born in Philadelphia, in 1898, studied singing and piano starting at the age of 7. Her parents stopped funding her hobby (no doubt they realized she had no talent) but she eventually went out on her own teaching piano and voice.

Her singing was absolutely terrible; she didn’t understand pitch or rhythm. Despite this “handicap,” she believed she was gifted and continued to sing. When her parents died, she inherited sufficient funds to get her long-delayed singing career off the ground. She took voice lessons and became involved with many social clubs in Philadelphia, which she funded. She became director of music for many of them and founded the Verdi Club.

She started giving recitals in 1912 and was always the main character of any event. People cheered her on, most likely because of her huge investments in the club. According to what’s written about her, she was convinced she was brilliant. Her accompanist, piano player Cosme McMoon was quite talented and somehow stuck it out with her. If he  tried to correct her, she would tell him the piano was out of tune. Every time he wanted to quit she would remind him he would be a star if he stayed with her because he could publish his own works.

At the age of 76, her fans convinced her to give a public recital at Carnegie Hall. The tickets’ sold out quicker than any other events and more than 5000 people were turned away. Up until this time, no public critics were allowed at any of her concerts but this was a public venue and the reviews were scathing.

Florence Foster Jenkins was devastated but vowed to continue her career. Unfortunately five days later, she had a heart attack in her favorite music store and died.  She is considered to have a cult like following of young and old.

puppetHow can you turn off those voices inside your head?

  1. Stop over thinking the situation. Most of the time when you think, people are judging you, they probably aren’t. Really unless you’re a huge public figure or movie star, why would they care?
  2. What they think about you is “none of your business.” You don’t have any control about what they think about you so why bother? It’s more important that you get a grip on what you think about yourself and do something about that.
  3. Give yourself the freedom to be who you are. You can’t be liked by everyone. It’s your life, enjoy it. Be confident in yourself and stop second guessing yourself.
  4. Learn to control your emotions and respect yourself. Building confidence comes from setting goals and achieving them. Not everyone will agree with you or like what you’re doing. But really whose problem is that? We should all have a little of Florence Foster Jenkins in our head.

Lisbeth Calandrino has been helping businesses improve their sales and customer service for over twenty years. She believes it all starts with their employees and teaching them how to be more confident and better communicators. To schedule a consultation with her or have her speak at your business, she can be reached at Lcalandrino@nycap.rr.com.

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By |2017-03-03T12:06:53+00:00March 15th, 2015|Blog, Blogging, Building a Brand|3 Comments

About the Author:

Lisbeth Calandrino is an award winning trainer, entrepreneur, and blogger and has spent over twenty years developing custom tailored marketing and customer service programs for businesses. Her recently published book, Red Hot Customer Service, 35 Sizzling Ways to Heat up Your Business and Ignite Your Sales defines the steps necessary to build a competitive advantage and turn great companies into unforgettable or red hot companies. Lisbeth admits that much of her knowledge came from her Italian grandfather who despite very little formal education and a limited English vocabulary, managed to became both successful and wealthy. Lisbeth has wonderful stories about Grandpa DiBiagio’s and her time spent learning how to managing Grandpa’s fruit stand. Because of Lisbeth’s experience as a business owner, having been the managing partner and owner of 7 furniture and carpet stores for 14 years, she is able to bring her extensive business knowledge and experience to all of her clients. Lisbeth’s awards include executive of the year award from the International Executive Association, Albany chapter (a business networking group) and first place honors in an international marketing contest for alternative medicine. A two time cancer survivor, she has spoken extensively about her experiences of cancer, offering words of comfort and inspiration. As an activist, Lisbeth has initiated and contributed to many charitable causes. She has worked with at-risk youth, spoken out against injustice and advocated to and helped to build resources for women. As a presenter, Lisbeth Calandrino is highly motivational, information-rich, and very entertaining. Her acute business sense, contagious enthusiasm, positive energy and fun sense of humor make her a dynamic presenter. Lisbeth is a member of New York, Historic Albany Foundation, educational director of Business Referrals Networking Group and member of the board of directors of the Animal Protective Foundation of Scotia, New York.

3 Comments

  1. Lorraine Martins March 15, 2015 at 6:27 pm

    Great advice, as always, Lisbeth.
    I think it gets easier as you get older to stop worrying about others. It’s too bad we can’t convince children.

  2. Lisbeth Calandrino March 15, 2015 at 6:48 pm

    Thanks for taking the time to comment.
    Maybe it does have to do with age; but I’m not sure self-esteem comes with age. Unless we do a lot of work on ourselves we take the same person with us throughout our lives. How’s Florida?

  3. James March 17, 2015 at 10:35 am

    In the beginning, it was just to write. Period. But for the same price, it turned into being a personal secretary .. writing, editing, brainstorming, keeping track of which blog posts went where, what have you. Not much of a problem until you slave away for hours and don’t get paid .. Then it’s a little bit of a problem.

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